I know your actual birthday isn't until tomorrow, but we've got a busy day planned for you and I don't want to miss my chance to write your birthday letter.
Besides -- I was in labor for 31 hours and you were nine and a half pounds, so the LEAST you can do is allow me an early birthday letter.
Oh Ean.
It's so cliche to say it, but I can't believe how quickly time has gone. I look at you now -- at 9 years old -- and I vacillate between beaming with pride at how far you've come and clinging desperately to the child you're leaving behind.
It's all happening so fast.
You made me a mother. I held your small, warm, jaundiced new body and you taught me about transformation. I nursed you through countless nights and you taught me about letting go of what I thought I knew. I've watched you grow and discover and become, and you taught me to love fiercely and without boundaries.
And now here you are. You are full of dirt and noise and boy-jokes. And yet you're so much more.
You are unapologetically, loudly, and proudly: YOU.
You are the boy who comes in from climbing trees and then wants to discuss the role of God in the creation of the universe.
You are the boy who, one minute is laughing hysterically at SpongeBob, and the next minute is watching the entire "I Have a Dream" speech on YouTube.
You are the boy who tells us about the new Wii game you really, really, realllllllyyyyy want, but also tells us that you have a very special job in this life -- and that job is to help heal the world by loving it.
You take your job seriously -- because, boy, do you LOVE this world. You approach everything you do, every experience you have, with unabashed joy and enthusiasm. It seeps through every cell in your body - and it's beautifully and blessedly contagious. It is your greatest gift to the world and I hope you cherish it as much as I do.
Keep being who you are, Ean. Keep listening to your heart. Keep it open to the joy.
You are a miracle and a blessing and are very, very loved.
Happy, Happy, Happy Birthday to my beautiful, unique and astonishing little boy.

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